Confuse-Ing Inter-Rapture #93

The Horrifying Truth About Kevin Vortex, MOO-Christ:
He did not so much rise from the dead as get returned from the dead, due to insufficient POSTAGE!
Kevin Vortex, MOO-Christ, is a SHAM! He is a two-bit, one horse fraud who couldn't name all seven planets in the metric system with one ear tied behind his house!
Kevin Vortex, GNU-PRICED: A bi-valved electric waffle with no more dignity than diesel-powered masking tape!
Heaven Four Texts: All things to all men, six eggs to one woman, two dollars and fifteen cents to one pound sterling, and take care that the ostritch is well cared for, GOD DAMN IT!

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